


The Problem With Blending In

by badideasthatshouldntbewritten



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Drug Use, Dubious Consent, Hand Jobs, M/M, Public Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 11:49:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14472141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/badideasthatshouldntbewritten/pseuds/badideasthatshouldntbewritten
Summary: It takes a bad night in an undercover operation for Naruto to decide ANBU is not for him.





	The Problem With Blending In

Naruto Uzumaki was not privy to this scene. The post-war climate created a divide. First the traditionalists, intent on repopulating those lost by marrying early and breeding often. Second were those so drunk off of victory and the ensuing peace that they had lost all sense of self-preservation.

Naruto was the former among many of the latter, enlisted in an undercover operation to catch petty drug dealers. He stood against the wall, clad in striped black and yellow boxers to glow under the blacklight, decorated in body paint that boasted positive, encouraging words. The words “Good” and “Vibes” written in arched letters above each of his nipples. Masking the brunt of his face was a sickness mask, his hair slicked back and streaked in a temporary electric blue to make it more difficult to identify him.

He wore the right feathers, but didn’t hold the right mannerisms. Men and women alike approached him, whipping out slang he wasn’t familiar with while he responded overly formal in ways that bored the clubgoers.

Like a new language, though, he’d picked up on some of the code with enough conversation.

A man with black hair appeared, dawning a simple cat mask, black eyes beneath. “That’s the body of a shinobi.”

“I don’t do that anymore,” Naruto shouted over the music, pounding bass thrumming in his ears and chest. He was mindful enough to squash his verbal tic.

“You wanna suck one down with me?”

The inquiry had two meanings. The immediate question being if Naruto wanted a drink, the implied question being ‘Do you find me attractive enough to fuck me?’. He well knew a ‘yes’ was what it would take to get the man comfortable enough to divulge.

“Yeah,” Naruto nodded, was motioned toward the bar where his new friend ordered for the both of them. He was thankful that even pulled down a bit, the straps on the mask and the lighting did a good enough job at concealing his whiskers when he’d taken the first sip of his drink. A matching pair of drinks was ordered, blue from colored curaçao, though a syrupy sweetness of a tropical fruit cocktail.

When a pair of stools had cleared, they’d taken their seats. The man had placed a hand on his upper thigh, middle and ring-finger tucking beneath a leg of his boxers in an overly-familiar way.

“You said you’re not a shinobi anymore. What do you do now?”

“Accountant,” Naruto laughed. It was a simple backstory. Shinobi turned accountant who got away from the monotony of his career by chasing the night.

“I always thought accountants were squares.”

“Do I look like a square to you?” Naruto challenged.

The man smiled. “No. Doesn’t mean you’re not a square. What’s your name?”

“Shoma.”

“Nice to meet you, Shoma. I’m Kenta.” He was almost certain it was a fake name.

“Back at you. What about you? You a shinobi?”

“On and off.”

“On and off?”

“Sometimes I am and sometimes I’m not.”

Bingo. This guy was suspicious. Naruto flashed a lopsided smile and drank his drink as he decided where to proceed. Thankfully, Kenta moved things along.

“You dance?”

Naruto looked to the floor, paraded an exaggerated face of sheepishness. “I’m a little shy.”

“I got just the thing.” Kenta reached into his pocket, furnished a small bottle. Not exactly innocuous, but certainly not grounds to arrest the man. Still, it was as good a start as any. Kenta tore off the seal, passed the bottle.

Naruto was thankful he was instructed on every substance he’d encounter. He uncapped the bottle covering the opening with his thumb, pretended to place it below a nostril and tamped down on the other one. He lowered his head so Kenta wouldn’t see him push most of the bottle out of the way when he inhaled. He held for a moment, covered the bottle with his thumb again, and then handed off the bottle back to Kenta who held his head up while he took hits.

“Alright, let’s go.” Drinks left behind, they got on the floor. Naruto was just glad to put the mask back on.

Naruto couldn’t dance. Didn’t know how. It wasn’t that the people on the floor were using any finesse, mostly just grinding or occupying space on the floor by making out with each other. A few couples had hands buried inside the pants of their partner, or in the lesser dressed clubgoers, their underwear.

Kenta wasn’t eager on such a push right away, but they danced close. A knee between his thighs, but not pressed up against him yet. Brushing though, meant to be teasing him but Naruto was wary one wrong move would result in pain.

One song bled into another, all sounding the same but there was a noticeable shift in intensity the way the bass raised from a low, droning rumble to a hard, distinct kick. A testament to the venue’s soundsystem, if anything.

His friend grinded on him in time with the kicks, closing that tenuous distance between them. Hand on a hip first, though far from hesitant when it decided to dip down to his ass. Another hand placed on his back to hold them flush together.

At similar enough heights, they were crotch to crotch. His partner chose slacks, thankfully, the fabric relatively thick containing his growing erection. Kenta’s mouth was on him, on his neck, edging along the mask having at the skin.

A stranger’s mouth trailing down, he was curious to see if the man would suck his nipples right on the floor. When he felt the hot, wet tongue he was left wondering no more, and looked around sheepishly to see if anyone was staring but everyone else seemed to be occupied by their own acts of indulgence.

It was with passive acceptance that he took the man going beneath the waistband of his boxers. He’d seen it around him, of course this was to follow. Kenta turned out to be quite the ass man, kneading roughly, squeezing, pulling at his cheeks.

Something was said between the crook of his neck and ear, lost to the music, but it was breathy and was followed up with a nip at the shell of his ear. Kenta stopped groping him, held the hand up and Naruto watched as he sucked on index and middle finger before slipping the hand back into his boxers.

Naruto breathed, braced himself, only remain grounded because he’d gone into this expecting the possibility. It was middle finger first. He was prodded at until it slipped in with an uncomfortably tight sensation. It retracted as suddenly as it came, index finger pushed in alongside and he found himself sucking in breath to keep him from throwing a rasengan straight through the guy’s stomach.

Kenta’s fingers slid further and curled, tugging upwards and pulling down again. Withdrawing his fingers halfway before plunging them in again. The slick of the saliva had mostly dried, the slide slow and a couple notches under painful.

He was turned, his back nearly flush against Kenta’s front. The change of angle allowed the fingers to go deeper, already so deep he felt it hot up to his belly. He felt the small seize in his chest, his stomach, his groin. Whatever his mind was thinking, his body certainly wasn’t in accordance. Naruto was getting hard.

Kenta was no slack in giving Naruto attention there, feeling for the head of Naruto’s cock under the thin material and pressing the heel of his palm into it. His thoughts had been clear before, but now they were swimming, the part of the body that had given into sensation had started infecting his mind.

It sure didn’t feel like work. Not anymore, not when Kenta slipped his hand in on the other side and starting jerking him off. Just a few jerks before retracting. Naruto turned his head, caught sight of Kenta reaching into his pocket again out of one eye and another little bottle emerged.

Not anything familiar to Naruto until he’d withdrawn his fingers from his ass and squeezed a bit into his palm, capping and pocketing the bottle again. He rubbed slicked fingers together and smiled.

Lubricant. Naruto recognized it then by the way it clung in wet, slack lines from finger to splayed finger. The fingers dipped in easily now, with Naruto’s own learning making it easier for his body to accommodate. The strokes were fluid, slow, a gentle thumb pressing in and circling the head. The music, the atmosphere, the people had all been drowned out and only the touch and heat existed.

The fingers in him withdrew again, and he turned his head halfway once again. He was detached from the moment, watching the lube come out again, the hand jacking him off giving him another few strokes before releasing him. Kenta unbuckled his belt, let his pants slide mid thigh.

Then he saw the other man’s cock, standing to attention, and his mind was back in focus. He realized real quick where this was going and how fast, right on the floor. Kenta slathered lube on his tool, tucked the waistband of Naruto’s boxers beneath the cheeks of his ass and he lined himself up and slowly pushed.

There was no way it’d fit, Naruto told himself first to calm down. The push was tight, now a couple notches below agony and surely Kenta would realize it was futile. Just the head was too much, stretching him too thin and Kenta still pushed yet. He slung an arm around Naruto’s chest and pulled him in flush, easing in deeper.

He felt breath on his ear again, probably more being said to him, not that he’d ever hear over the screech of brassy synths. He felt the man’s pelvis against his ass. Holy fuck it fit. Kenta held, shifted under the guise of dancing and sucked at the skin below Naruto’s jaw.

The hand came back around to continue the handjob, and once he started pumping his hand he pumped his hips in time, becoming less subtle in fucking him on the dancefloor.

A horrible feeling. Though thrilling, utterly thrilling in the same way his first fight against someone with killing intent was. Usually that kind of adrenaline prime for quick, savvy decision making, but coupled with arousal it made him stupid. It made him buck into the hand hoping for more feeling, chasing satisfaction.

He felt it deep, that cheap kind of pleasure and his mind reeled. For a minute, he understood the people around him and tossed his head back on Kenta’s shoulder to let out a groan meant to convey pleasure and anger in kind because, fuck it, no one could hear him over the noise anyway.

When he came, it was the most intense orgasm of his life and he’d already been overwhelmed. His wilting cock was released, and Kenta reached for the bottle to take another hit, taking a deep inhale out of each nostril and giving a few slow thrusts before slamming into Naruto hard. So hard now that Naruto was certain other people had noticed but he dared not look up.

It was three final full-on thrusts, Naruto counted them. On the third, Kenta settled deeply, moaned something unheard into his shoulder and came deep in him.

Then he withdrew, stuffed himself back in his pants and pulled Naruto’s boxers back up. Naruto was taken by the wrist, led out into a hallway, music growing more muffled and distant with every step until his friend was audible.

“You wanna come back to my place?”

“Depends,” Naruto tried his hand at flirtatious teasing, but he was just about exhausted at this point and he realized he sounded more burdened. He tapped the pocket where the amyl nitrites bottles were kept. “You got anymore fun toys to play with?”

“Baby, I can guarantee I’ve got anything you could want.” Kenta pulled his billfold from his pocket, and where one would keep cash he pulled out a small plastic baggy half-full of multi-colored pills.

Got him. For good measure, Naruto threw in a giggle and followed the man out. He pulled him into the alley, and with a surge of chakra straight to his arm he grabbed Kenta by the back of the neck and slammed him face-down into the garbage can.

“You’re under arrest.” Naruto removed his mask, Kenta catching a look of him from his periphery.

“Naruto?”

First name. Last name not appended, which meant he knew the guy. Warily now, he removed Kenta’s mask. He should’ve known it the moment he’d seen the eyes. Stunned by the very sight of Sasuke Uchiha, stunned by the very clearly misaligned values he’d assumed of the man, stunned by everything that had just happened in the span of an hour, Naruto loosened his grip a little first before altogether lifting his hand off.

Sasuke remained in place for a moment before turning, staring in return. Both locked in a stand still, aggression completely sapped from them.

Naruto exhaled. “I hate this fucking job.” He’d turned without another word and started his walk home hoping he could ignore the squelch of Sasuke’s cum as he walked. In his mind, he was already planning his ANBU resignation letter.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry they're pretty OOC. I got this idea by literally just watching porn of people fucking in nightclubs so I had to cobble together this half-assed story of how Naruto could accidentally take Sasuke's load in rave gear on a dancefloor. Thanks for reading this totally self-indulgent drivel


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